This rad handyman dude that works at 3F was telling me about how in the summer he goes hunting in Arkansas, which was a perfect opportunity to ask an expert how to clean the guts off animal skulls. I would never hunt (well never say never, but lets be real. The only interest I have in guns is shooting one of those rapid-fire machine guns--where you wear the ammo across your chest--at the red carpet of the Oscars) but I am interested in animal bones, skulls, and fur. He told me if I found a dead animal all I have to do to clean it is to take it to a car wash and blast the shit out of it (in the middle of the night, obviously) with a gnarly high-powered hose. Done and done! Picture that photo-op of all quick time! Especially cos I'd most likely be wearing my bright yellow rain poncho that has Mickey Mouse on it! Yowza! Hopefully I won't have to do that intense ceremony though if this good ol boy comes through as he offered and gets me a bear skull! The casualness of his offer, the nonchalance about it, the no big d he made it seem, makes me hope he's being for real! He also told me he could get me "tons" of coyote skulls too. I already have one coyote skull, but if I had many...jeez I could do any number of things with those (Burning Man anyone? Paint em all *funky* and sell them? SYKE). I think I would build a plexi-glass box and fill it with them and use it as a side table. Or I'd have them laying around everywhere. Who knows!
These are bear skulls
This dude, the handyman, doesn't hunt animals though, he hunts birds and fish. Yes, fish. I was like, "how do you hunt a fish???" Well apparently if you "hunt" the type of fish that this madman does, you are hunting a weird ass fucker that has the beak (?) snout (?) WHATEVER it would be called, of a dolphin--so like long, but with insane teeth that are really long and evil and sharp, so you catch it with a net, and THEN (no big deal) shoot it between the eyes with a 38. IMAGINE.
ANYTHING LESS WOULD BE UNCIVILIZED!
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