Sunday, February 21, 2010

Dear Friends

I want to say that I have the best friends in the world, friends I prob don't deserve, but thank you, and I love you so much. I know i should keep it simple, but I'm really overwhelmed by you, and maybe a blog is a gay place to let you know, but whatever. Xtra special thanks to Drew, you truly rule.

Monday, February 15, 2010

The devil wears diesel

Yesterday I was waiting for the bus at 6pm after work. The bus stop is in front of the most awful bar in the history of the world. Its the kind of place that is PACKED with jocks by 10am on Saturday and Sunday mornings. ANYWAY. This dude comes up behind me and goes, "You wanna go somewhere?"
Seeing as this person didn't address me to my face, I did not respond. Then he comes around and says again, "Can we go somewhere?" He is wicked fucked up. And he looks like a backstreet boy/eurotrash idiot. Then he starts blathering and CRYING, slapping himself in the face and saying, "I DON'T KNOW WHERE I AM, I DON'T KNOW WHERE I AM RIGHT NOW! I'm from California, I'm a nice kid, I'm a good kid, I swear."

So I'M like (concerned--seriously) "Okay, well I'll help you, where are you trying to go?" And he's like, "My singer just killed himself man, he just OD'd, and I have $10,000 in cash [which he pulled out and he seriously had a wad of 100's the size of a potato, which he was so sloppy and fucked up I thought he was going to drop it--I was hoping he would because I wouldve grabbed it and RAN] and I spent 2 grand on diesel clothes today."
I'm just staring at him.
"I don't do drugs man, I swear, I don't drink, I'm a clean cut kid."
"Seriously will you get a drink with me right now? I'm in a band, Devil Wears Prada, we were supposed to play at House of Blues tonight but my singer fucking died in front of the place and the tour bus just dropped me off at this bar." The bar is nowhere NEAR house of blues btw.
"I have ten thousand dollars in CASH!!! Please, lets get a drink somewhere! I'm COVERED in tattoos, am I okay? I'm okay right? God I'm so COLD! [It was not that bad] Please, come with me, I don't know what to do."
Of couse the bus is coming and I have to get on it. He asks if he can come with me and I say yes, but he bails when I say I can't get a drink. It was Valentines Day man! I had dinner plans! Otherwise you ALL know I would've been BOUT IT BOUT IT.

PS I looked online and that band was scheduled to play HOB. Whatever. I've never heard of that wack shit, and their myspace said they are Christian Hardcore. Amazing.

Sunday, February 14, 2010

A peek into my life. I think I need a psychiatrist.

Hi Brittany, Congratulations re your win and thanks very much for your immediate payment. Your trolls will be shipped tomorrow Feb 15. Please allow sufficient time for delivery as this service is surface and the mail is often slow crossing the border. Best regarda, Marilyn.

That would be a waste of tiiiimeeee

Friday, February 12, 2010

This stuff takes a long time to make

As much as an egomaniac I can seem like and be, it is hard for me to show stuff I work on. Other people do it with such ease, but I hate it. Anyway, some people asked for it so here it is. If you click on the individual pictures they'll enlarge. Some of them are hard to see cos my apartment is beyond Grey Gardens (in both good and bad ways) and my camera is pretty butts, so theres not too many ideal locations inside to take pics. ALSO if anybody is friends with John Galliano, send him this link so he can see my raw talent and hire me so I can stop serving Diet Cokes the size of a sand bucket to chicks with Coach bags.

Wednesday, February 10, 2010

They Bout To Find Yo Body

Before all else, check my around-the-house look for today

Psychobilly! I CAN EXPLAIN. My dream hairdo is Peg Bundy style, so I put in some old timee rollers. I didn't achieve the height I wanted, but my hair looked fantastic. I took a pic but my camera is in the kitchen and I'm too tired to go get it. You'll see the effects soon as I plan to do my hair like this everyday.

I have been WAY into cupcakes lately and treated myself at Sbux the other day. Look at the contraption they put it in!

Chill out you guys! Its not like I'm buying a baseball diamond. They packed that thing like fine china. Such a waste. I ripped it out of that damn thing and ate it in two seconds. I took the box home cos I felt bad throwing it away, but what am I going to do with it? I put it in the garbage at home. I do not need to have such a complicated relationship with a BOX!

Per so many (well a few) requests, here are some pics of things I'm working on. I thought I'd start it off with some shots of my work zone.

These colors all together are rad

This is off the cooler in a liquor ("party") store. IMAGINE THIS PHOTOSHOOT!

Speaking of insane in the membrane photoshoots, peep this sitch!

This one is wicked too, have you EVER seen a model pose like this? Those hands! HIDEOUS. Who works here????

ANYWAY. More inspo
Keanu's grade school picture!

Postcard from Ed Templeton SF show

Pic from a thrifted yearbook in a xmas ornament, where are you now?

Born Against, one of my fav bands EVER

Yes, that is an animal's leg. Sorry bud.

How dope is this book? The colors are crushing.

The other side of this is a Charles Bronson flier. It is from 1997.

This patch is rad but I'd feel weird wearing it on something. I got it at a garage sale, and the person gave me some boring, braggy story about getting it in london(zzzz...) and then I saw he had some photos of old friends of mine, and he made me buy them! Who sells photos like that at a garage sale?

I went to get my hair dyed like this (coon tail) a few years ago, and the idiot forgot to put some chemical in to make the dye work. So I sat at the stupid place for like 2 hours with no results! Then the chick is like, "Just come back this week, I'll do it over." YEAH RIGHT buttface! I already sat in this embarrassing hellzone all afternoon, and payed you $50! Eat balls! It would've been sick though, if it worked.

The two best found photos OF ALL TIME with the best sentiment of all time (arrangement coinsidental and insignificant). The photo of the woman was found by me in a purse at the thrift store, inside a card with a weird letter. In the wrong hands this relic would've long ago decayed in a landfill. Instead it now intrigues the minds of all who happen to see it. So like me and maybe the two people a year who go in my workroom.

You can also kinda see my Damien H rip off skull

which has NOTHING on this savage beast I bought the other day for $12 (kind of pricey, but what could I do, NOT buy it? SURE.)

More tapes

Well duderinos and duderinas I'm going to have to leave this one a cliffhanger and show you more pics, the pics I promised, tomorrow cos its late and I'm zonked now.
Catch ya on the flippety flop my homies.